Body positivity blogs are great, but some of them are, let’s say, hardcore. There’s a lot of emphasis on learning to love your body and all its physical flaws. This sounds amazing on paper/screen but it’s a really hard thing to do in practice. Love is a strong emotion and to go from hating something so strongly that you’re considering surgery, to having a place in your heart for it is pretty tricky stuff. No wonder so many of us are failing.
But how about instead of swooning over our big ears or crooked teeth, we just learn to accept them.
Now I should point out that if you have truly learnt to love your ‘flaws’ then that’s great and I’m doing cheerleading celebratory poses just for you. Likewise, if you hated a part of your body so much that you decided to change it through exercise or surgery and are happy with the results then that’s great as well. Your body is your own so as long as you’re happy and healthy then you can have it however you want.
Still, if we’re not looking for love or a big change, how can we be content with how we look? These are a few tips that I’ve picked up over the years.
1.Look at yourself properly
Most of the time when I looked in the mirror and saw my nose from the side angle I hated I’d make a disgusted face and quickly hide away from my reflection. This soon started to make my nose like some kind of mouldy piece of food or dead animal on the side of the road. Something you automatically cringe at, and that your brain makes worse in your head.
Over time I started to force myself to look at it properly, and rather than analyse everything bad about it, just look at it for what it was. Which is a nose. Just a nose. The more I stripped away the over dramatic image my mind had come up with about it, the more I realised it wasn’t quite as bad as I thought it was. I still don’t love it, but I definitely don’t hate it, and I can see that it’s nowhere near as terrible as my brain liked to make out.
2.Is your flaw affecting your life?
Have you ever opened the door to collect a parcel from the postman and he’s refused to give it to you because of the positioning of your cheekbones? Have you nearly died in a terrifying canoeing excursion simply because of the birthmark on your neck? It’s…unlikely.
We’re not on this earth to be beautiful, and if you are then that’s a plus. We’re here to laugh, be kind, make friends, find love, and find happiness. It’s great to dress up and feel pretty, but we’re all so much more than our appearance. It’s your personality that’s going to shape your life the most, so focus on improving that rather than your features, because in the end, that’s what makes us beautiful or ugly.
3.Your body has a history
Do you want to know what’s amazing about your body? You have genetic features that have been shared by your ancestors from thousands of years ago. You could go back to Tudor times, meet a relative and they could have the same eyes or ears or lips as you. Your features and even your body type is a part of history, and if you ever choose to have children (or already have them) then you’re helping to pass that on.
4.No one’s judging you as hard as you’re judging yourself
It’s been said before but we are always our worst critic. Something that seems so awful and highly noticeable to you is really not as big of a deal as you think. Maybe once in a while someone in the street will look at you, but don’t assume it’s always going to be in a negative way. I look at people all the time when I go out because I like their clothes, their makeup, their face, or I’m just zoning out and happen to focus on them.
Maybe once in a while, you’ll meet a horrible person who will say something about your appearance. I’ve had people make fun of my weight and height before and it hurts. The thing to remember is that those people are the type to find something wrong with everyone. Seriously, show them a picture of Angelina Jolie and they’ll comment on her crows feet. People like that are not the norm. Don’t make them important by taking on their comments.
I’m still fairly young and so still learning how to accept the things that I can’t change about my body. If any of you have any tips or things that you do to help with your own acceptance and want to share I’d love to read them.
Sending you all positive vibes. Until my next post, bye bye.